About seven months ago at the very bottom of Rhett’s two month update, I decided to share that I wanted to begin training for a half marathon.
Now, fast forward to present day, past the heat and humidity of summer, the necessity to take Rhett out in his jogging stroller for 95% of my runs, and a general and overwhelming tiredness from being a first time Mom. Spoiler alert: I’m not anywhere near my 13.1 miles.
Here’s the thing friends. Today I went on a very successful three mile run, the first one I’ve done in a little over a year. I can’t tell you how proud of myself I was after stopping almost every run at 2-2.5 miles over the last few months due mostly, I think, to the psychology of pushing your body. Upon my return home my husband looked up excitedly and asked how far I had gone (something I’ve asked him to do to help hold myself accountable) and I proudly told him that today I had finally done it after weeks of wimping out, a nice 3.05 mile run.
But here’s the other thing. Telling you that I ran a “successful” three mile run honestly makes me want to be embarrassed. Was my time great? No. My pace? Erring on the side of the turtle instead of the hare. I have two friends that ran the Chicago Marathon over the weekend, friends that regularly run awe inspiring distances, and friends that do this all while balancing two children and a full time job.
Today I had a choice. I needed to choose between being proud of myself for running three miles (something I’ve done twice thus far in life) or being embarrassed because this small victory is nothing compared to what people I know are doing on a daily basis. And you know what? I’m going to choose to feel good. Because even though this was a small victory, I proved a little something to myself today. I proved that I can use this body that’s been through so much in the past year and a half to accomplish the things that I want. That if I can run three miles I’m sure when I’m ready I can go for that half marathon. And that’s the point. It’s whenever I am ready. Not when I feel others need me to be. To do one small thing each day, without pushing myself, helps me to feel better. I may not have the body I did before I had a baby but I’m working for it and it’s my choice to feel good about it.
Every day there is a choice to make and today I choose a small victory. I hope you can choose that too.